To give you the best chance of fulfilling your potential for good health, happiness, and success, you must leave hurt, bitterness, and other negative feelings behind. By following a specific formula of forgiveness – the Morter Forgiveness Process – you can neutralize negative residue of the past.
Forgiveness on your part does not lessen the seriousness or tragic nature of a situation. Forgiveness doesn’t change the situation. It changes your physiological responses to the memory of the situation. You forgive, for your sake! When you forgive another person, your forgiveness doesn’t affect him or her any more than your hate or animosity does. You can hate someone else for years without altering his or her success and happiness. In fact, while you are making yourself sick with hate, the other person is going merrily along in life, completely undisturbed. You don’t forgive for the sake of the offender; it’s for your sake that you forgive.
Here’s how to start: Identify a situation, action, or person you feel needs to be forgiven. This is something that comes to your mind often, even though it may not be pertinent to your current focus. Recall your feelings, thoughts, and emotions on the subject.
Now, having identified and thought about a person, action, or situation, you are ready to begin the steps of forgiveness. It is important to note again that you don’t have to agree with the actions of the other person or the event to forgive. You are forgiving for you. Until you forgive the past, this other person or event is controlling your life. This is true even if the other person is no longer alive.
Here are the 5 Steps of Forgiveness to be carried out with feeling and emotion.
1. Forgive yourself.
You must first forgive yourself for allowing the event to affect your health.
2. Forgive the other person.
Forgive the other person for any harm he or she may have caused you.
3. Give the other person permission to forgive you.
Maybe you did something you weren’t aware you did. It is not recommended that the other person knows you are taking this step. You are doing this for you!
4. See the good in the situation.
Learn the lesson the situation taught you.
5. Be thankful, and wish everyone well!
Be thankful for the experience and the lesson it taught you. Wish them well and really mean it!