Dr. Ted here! I was sitting at a local coffee house the other morning before heading on into the office when I received a text on my phone. The text was from someone in my distant past, whom I really didn’t care to hear from or answer. That feeling alone had me thinking about what this simple text had surfaced from deep inside. And, as I sat there thinking, my thoughts began to creep back to the time and space of that prior relationship. The old feelings of anger kicked right in. My perfectly lovely morning had derailed. And then I caught myself. I was playing the victim! When I re-lived the relationship, even though it’s long over, I re-engaged the pattern from the past. I’m sure this happens to some of you as well. So, here’s what you can do.
The first step is to re-frame the pattern. What if I were to look at the previous situation with a completely different perspective? What if it all had happened in a perfect way? Was I looking at this from a tainted viewpoint? How was that serving me? And, was it that bad, or did I just perceive it that way?
Based on the principles of Morter HealthSystem, remember that no person or group of people has the power to make me or you feel a certain way. Only I can determine how I feel. I’m a strong individual; I’m a great person; I’m blessed. Everything that has happened to me has really happened for me. It was perfect and it happened for a specific reason in my development. And, I don’t have to understand that reason completely; I just need to know there was a reason.
Once I went over all of this in my mind, I instantly felt better and resumed my perfectly lovely morning! You know, it’s impossible to start a new chapter in your life if you keep reading the past chapters over and over again.
Today, take a look at the chapters of your life and the experience you have deemed as “wrong” or “upsetting,” and re-write them with a different ending.
Use the experience to realize how it has really helped you in some way. And, it has, I assure you. Then, take this opportunity to really update your pattern neurologically by doing the Morter March while being thankful and grateful for that life-enhancing experience. Life lessons are always life enhancing. In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, “In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.”